I am so sick of it.
The depression. The pain. The loss. What does it leave in our wake?
A shocked and grieving nation; social media showing pictures and people professing their love.
I’m not sick of that… the tokens of respect.
I’m sick of losing people. Losing people. LOSING PEOPLE!
It hurts. It fucking hurts bad.
When will we stop wearing masks? When will be say, oh hey, maybe there’s an epidemic in the country and address mental health and emotional needs When will we stop being so fucking self absorbed and actually BE THERE when someone needs us… I mean ACTUALLY FUCKING BE THERE and not let someone feel they are alone… trapped in the bell jar of celebrity status. Did Robin have any real friends? Was he afraid to reach out? He had relapsed and been back in rehab again… his show got cancelled… both are major triggers for ANYONE to be depressed. Was he afraid of tabloids posting another story about him? WHO KNOWS.
But what we do know is:
Just like so many of us, he wrestled with demons and felt cut off and alone. Maybe not always.But he did at the pinnacle moment when he made a choice to leave us all behind clutching our DVDs through our tears. I cried watching Dead Poet’s Society when I was fifteen. My boyfriend bawled in the end scene of Mrs. Doubtfire. We both sniveled through “It’s not your fault,” in Good Will Hunting. I laughed my ass off watching him shake his in The Fisher King. Every movie, surrounded by a good memory, brought to life by a great actor.
LIfe is fragile and we don’t know who’s hurting. It’s not their call to tell us. IT’S OUR CALL TO ASK.
Do you feel depressed? With no hope? Have you had thoughts of ending your life? I’m not a professional, but I urge you to call this number and receive help: 1-800-273-TALK.
It’s a courageous thing to admit you’re hurting and get the help you need. I’m not saying that Robin never did that. I’m not saying he wasn’t courageous because my God did he have some mountains he overtook. I’m saying at that one point, he felt alone. AND YOU ARE NOT.
Tell someone you love them today.
Survive.
~Sasha
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